Saturday, November 9, 2013

The Dance of Life

Have you ever had an argument (in your mind at least) where you are angry and upset about something and you it carry through to an unpleasant ending?

Of course, you have. Who hasn’t? So have I. We have our opinions, and others have theirs too. But, that day, you didn’t let your friend have their opinion, and you take their “imperfect thoughts” too seriously. Bam! Instant fool. Yes, we human beings can easily stand up straight with both feet stuck in our mouths.

You have years of childhood and adult programming to overcome, and too many years of teaching ‘n preaching (literally). You think, you can be accepting, positive, and not pushy. Your friends are truly kind, unselfish, and good hearted people. But yet you still give in to your egoic self, because it believes that you don’t matter anymore. At least the ego tells you that.

Matter? To what? To whom? What is your problem? Don’t want to be a victim of love and life, of government and corporations? Family or friends? Yep, the ego doesn’t want to feel small and helpless. Yet, your mind has these important (seems like) thoughts and your mouth just can’t shut up. The ego likes to win. Or as Captain Kirk said in a Star Trek movie where he cheated and won the impossible scenario, “I don’t like to lose.” And, I am one of those.

You don’t like to lose, as a paratrooper, as a fighter pilot, as a man or woman, as an airline pilot, as a father, as a boss, or as a spouse or as a child. Let’s face it, the ego doesn’t like to lose. WE don’t like to lose. Beat the drum loudly. Time goes by…

After the silence and self-reflectance, we realize, what did I have to prove? Your ego is forgiven, and you kick it once more in the ass for a reminder, and guess what? You stop trying to make your point, where your ego absolutely loves to hear itself talk and act out. Yes, its a chest-thumping, wild animal that loves to hear itself talk. You know, in our minds, we all have that craziness, whether we speak softly and appear calm, or shout it out because inside you are mad, and suffering from years of stinking thinking and programming.

So, you give in to the feeling that you don’t need to say or prove anything. Then, miraculously, the calm confidence sets in… You stop thinking that way, and more importantly, you stop talking. And you realize that the whole argument strikes you as ridiculous and absurd. Pressure is relieved, you come up for air, and you no longer feel the anger, the fear, and feeling of being attacked. And… You. Start. To. Laugh. At. Yourself.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could do that any time, any place, and in any situation? Maybe we’d all feel free, and happy, because you are learning to do one very simple thing... Freely LETTING GO at will, continuously, and without regret. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? Now your Self is in charge, and you are no longer at the mercy of the world. It would be nice if our noisy mind’s thoughts no longer have to exit through the mouth. A perfectly boring world. Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe so. But, a peaceful world in your heart and Soul.

But, sometimes, we oblige our egos and dance “one step forward, and two steps back.”

I took ballroom dancing lessons for almost two years. We had to leave our ego's at the door. That's how we learn and let go. Just like with dancing lessons, mistakes are made, we learn, live, love, and forgive ourselves and others. The Dance of Life.

Take care.

© 2013 Michael G. Hesley
All Rights Reserved


  1. This is beautiful insight into the things we do unconsciously every day. I'm proud to call you my friend! Well said.

  2. Yes, I've enrolled into a new class being given by a professor: Behaviorial Sciences 101, "How Not to be a Total Stupid Jackass" ;-))))

    Ha Ha Ha!